May 19, 2001
Olga's funeral service was held on May 18-19,
2001. Her body was cremated and then her
ashes buried at Assumption Cemetary here
in Austin, near the northwest corner of the
intersection of I-35 South and Ben White
Boulevard.
Eulogies
These eulogies were read at Olga's
funeral
service:
Mama
My first breath
Small and shallow
You were there
My first smile
One of so many
Because of you
You were there
My first roll.
When I sat up
But never crawled
So much time in your arms
You were there
My first step
Inspired by you
You were there
First day of school
Missing you
But when it was over
You were there
My first girlfriend
The break-up
Feigning strength
You knew better
You were there
Cut from the team
It was a mistake
You were there
Thrilling victory
Bitter defeat
No matter what
You were there
A young relationship
Too many fights
Listening to me
Knowing I loved her
You were there
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High school done
Your pride so clear
You were there
Off to college
Only 5 miles away
Seemed so far, but
You were there
Married at 20
Young but you knew
How happy I was
Dancing with Mama
You were there
A job and a house
Your love the foundation
You were there
Lunch at my house
Pregnancy announced
Grandma to be
You were there
Then cancer struck
Dropped like a bomb
Tables turned
Your time of need
Was I there?
A battle began
Fighting for life
Was I there?
One life fading
Another beginning
Ladies needed me
Was I there?
Your first grandchild
Cancer kept you away
A girl was born
As soon as able
You were there
Holding Seri
A love familiar
You were there
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Good news came
A month of hope
Followed by hurt
Was I there?
One year became
Three months became
Less than two
Pain undeserved
Was I there?
Daily visits
Time created
I tried to be there
All you gave
I could only give
The love I had
I tried to be there
Mama slipping away
The last "I Love You"
Will last forever
Peace at last
We were there
I knew it would come
But still I ask
Where are you?
Then she smiles
The sparkle in her eye
I've seen it before
You're still here
This I promise
She will be reared
To know how good you were
And how much she can be
You will always be here.
By Sef |
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Mom
Being here, standing up here, is the hardest
thing I have ever had to
do. Last Wednesday
evening my mother passed
away after a year
long battle with cancer.
My father and I
each held a hand of the
most beautiful, wonderful
person we have ever known
in both our lives
as she took her last breaths
in this world.
When the last breath came
and went, and she
was gone, it truly felt
like a ton of bricks
had fallen on top of me,
the pain was overwhelming
the first second she was
gone, as it still
is right now, and will
forever be.
It is such great pain because of how unbelievably
great a person she was, and how great a mother
she was. I'll go ahead and spit out the old
cliché that she was the best mother anyone
could ask for. But it is so true in the case
of my mother. In the last year of her life,
she made good point to tell me that my brother
and I were the joys of her life. What else
could a son ask for from his mother? To know
that raising me and my brother was the best
thing in her life is so gratifying and heartwarming.
No mother could ever love her children more
than my mom. Her heart beat with ours. Much
of how much we meant to her I have had to
learn from my father throughout life, but
that doesn't mean I didn't feel her love
every moment I was with her. She would say,
I love you more than you'll ever know, Patrick.
I think now maybe I know.
Anytime I was not with my mom, somewhere
she was not, she worried
so much about me.
Just the simple fact that
she was such a
worry wart always showed
me how much she
cared for and loved me.
She never wanted
to see me get hurt, or
get in trouble. Unfortunately
on a cold night in February
1998 I was getting
drunk, at just fifteen
years old, at a party.
After leaving the party
and hoping to go
to another, my friends
and I were pulled
over and arrested for drinking
underage.
After getting a most shocking
call from the
police, my parents came
and picked me up
around 1 a.m. that night.
As they pulled
up to get me, I could see
through the window
my mom crying, so upset
at what I had done,
but thankful I was okay.
Her tears opened
the floodgate of my own,
and we both cried
a lot that night. It hurt
me to see her cry,
and it hurt even more to
know I had caused
those tears. Of course
being a stupid, stubborn
teenager, I also feared
the punishment they
would give me for my actions.
The reason
I mention this story is
because through her
tears that night, it showed
me how much she
cared for me, how much
she loved me. I just
wish now I hadn't made
her upset by doing
things, like drinking in
high school. She
always told me I shouldn't,
or that wasn't
good for me. As teenagers,
we mainly just
think about our world,
about ourselves and
our friends, without taking
the time to consider
our parents' feelings.
We don't cherish family
enough. And we always think
our parents are
wrong. But now I realize
they were always
right, and they only had
the rules and did
the things they did because
they loved me
so much, and never wanted
to see me get hurt.
I was so close to Mom. At times it felt like
we were the same person.
Whenever I saw her
cry for one reason or another,
I cried. This
is not an exaggeration.
I am an emotional
guy, ask anyone who knows
me. When I would
see my mom, someone I loved
so incredibly
much, hurt, I couldn't
help but cry with
her. Like any married couple,
my mom and
dad had their share of
fights over the years.
And just like me, my mom
was a passionate
and emotional person, so
she would a lot
of the time cry during
or after the fights
with my dad. Seeing this
hurt me so much,
and even if it were a fight
that did not
induce tears, I would cry
anyway, because
seeing my mom upset affected
me so much.
I would get upset at my
dad and yell back
at him. It wasn't so much
that I was against
my dad, it was just that
I couldn't take
my mom crying and I felt
like I had to end
the fighting somehow, to
defend her. She
was the most important
person in my life,
I couldn't see her in pain.
On the opposite side of the spectrum, when
my mom was happy, I felt
joy in my heart.
Her smile made me smile.
Her laugh made me
laugh. Growing up, and
even to some degree
today (although I'm getting
better), I have
not always particularly
liked myself. It
is so hard to explain,
and I won't go into
it now of course, but I
don't always like
who I am. But when I was
with my mom, all
of that disappeared. I
didn't have to try
around her. I could make
her laugh just by
looking at her goofy. I
never really felt
bad when I was with her.
She would pick me
up when I was down. She
could always tell
when I was down at all,
and would ask me
what's wrong to try and
help me out, and
when I did talk to her
she did help me. But
when I would ignore her,
it seemed that my
mini-depressions would
worsen. Not talking
to her sometimes hurt me
even more. I always
enjoyed just chillin' out
with Mom because
our personalities are so
much alike. My friends
and a lot of my family
know how goofy a guy
I can be, weird as some
people might say,
but everything like that
I got from my mom.
I don't know for sure,
but I feel like I
knew her goofy, funny side
more than anyone.
My dad is a straight arrow,
not a very goofy
man who cracks jokes all
the time, usually
telling me to not do it
so often. But my
mom never really told me
that, she just laughed
with me. It hurts me so
much that I can't
make her laugh anymore,
can't see her smile
again, and can't hear her
call me any of
the weird things she'd
call me when I was
acting goofy. I never had
to cover up the
way I was feeling when
I was with her, and
I'll miss that. She was
the only person in
my life that truly made
me feel good about
myself. I am going to miss
that more than
anything.
I wish my mom hadn't gone through so much
pain, both emotionally
and physically, in
her last year of life.
She was the strongest
person I probably will
ever know, but even
she couldn't take it sometimes.
I know she
didn't want to leave her
family yet, she
was just 47 years old,
her sons just 23 and
18. I have had my share
of sheer anger as
I witnessed what was happening
to her this
past year, what was happening
to us. It still
to this day seems so unfair
for such a terrific
and beautiful person to
be taken away. She
offered so much to those
who knew her. One
of my good friends, who
knows what it's like
to lose a parent, called
her his second mom.
That's how much she touched
the people that
knew her. It seems unfair,
and it hurts so
much, but I guess if there
is any good that
came out of this, I just
have to look at
my father. I have seen
how much pain this
has brought him over the
last year, my mom
was his best friend, his
everything. The
way he took care of her
until the very end
is so admirable. He has
been so courageous
and strong throughout this
whole ordeal.
In my teenage years, I
and my father had
a rocky relationship, not
the worst, but
not the best. Our personalities
can sometimes
clash and it can get ugly.
But over the last
year I realized just how
much my dad loved
Mom, how much he cared
for her. I know now
more than ever. We both
lost the most important
person in our lives, and
over the past year,
we have grown closer. Growing
up I would
always tell my mom I loved
her, but I never
really told my dad that.
Well, I love you
Dad, and I will always
be there for you.
It is so hard to believe that my mom is gone,
that I'll never be able
to hold her hand
again, or see her smile,
or make her laugh.
And as I stand here and
say goodbye to the
most important person in
my life, I hope,
I hope so much that I will
see her again
someday. If you can hear
me Mom, I love you
so much, more than you'll
ever know. I will
miss you Mama, so much,
but I know you'll
forever be in my heart,
somehow helping me
become the person you were,
the angel who
so blessed my life.
I love you Mom. I love you.
By Patrick |
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Olga
Olga was my friend, my best friend, a truly
good friend for the past
26 years. I truly
loved Olga, as much as
any one can love another
person. We were married
for almost 25 years
and I will miss her more
than can be described.
There is so much that can be said of someone
as good, as kind, as giving, as compassionate,
concerned and caring, as Olga. To those of
you here today who did not personally know
Olga, those words may seem too easily or
too often used in describing someone in a
eulogy. But to those of us here who were
fortunate enough to know Olga, who ever spent
any time with her, know that Olga defined
good, kind, giving, and caring.
I want to start by thanking Olga's parents
Ray and Aurora Ramírez for giving us such
a beautiful person, and I want to thank her
brother and sister John and Irma for sharing
Olga with us.
I met Olga in August 1974, here in Austin,
at the old Safeway Store located at 11th
Street and Interregional Highway. We worked
there as checkers. I had just turned 20.
She had just turned 21. Olga was beautiful.
Back then, she had beautiful dark brown hair,
that fell more than 12 inches below her waist.
On my first day at work Olga greeted me with
a smile, asked my name, and then handed me
my cash register till. No, it wasn't love
at first sight. Later in our life together,
she told me she wondered why I hadn't smiled
back. Many of you here know that isn't unusual.
Nevertheless, our friendship grew each and
every day, until we became very close friends.
Olga's smile was beautiful and sweet. It
was easy to become her friend. It soon became
easy to fall in love with her.
Not too long after we met, we began dating.
Olga loved to dance and we went dancing almost
every night. She had been a drill team member
in high school and was taking dance while
attending the University of Texas. She graduated
from the University in 1975, with a degree
in The Humanities. Those were good times.
I fell in love with Olga within a few months
of meeting her, maybe it was just a few weeks.
And, my love for Olga continued to grow.
Her love of life, her faith in people, and
her deep abiding respect for everyone she
met made it easy. Olga always looked for
and saw the beauty inside the person, she
never judged anyone by his or her outward
appearance or station in life.
Finally, in early 1976, I won over Olga's
heart, and we decided to get married. She
told me many times that year that she wanted
to make certain our love never got in the
way of our being friends. Our friendship
was one of the most important things in our
life together. On July 9, 1976, Olga and
I went out on our last date as single people.
We had a great time; we never stopped smiling
that night. We were married the next day
on July 10, 1976, in Guadalupe County, Texas.
Even after we married, our friendship continued
to grow. And so did our family. Olga gave
birth to our son Sef on September 1, 1977,
and five years later to Patrick. To Olga,
being a mother was the most important role
she could ever take. Olga gave her children
total and unconditional love. She instinctively
knew and believed deeply that being a mother
meant above all else showing kindness and
caring, listening carefully, accepting that
your children's needs, wants and ideas are
just as valid and important as your own,
and respecting your children's beliefs. Not
only did she believe these truths, but she
lived them every day with our children. And
it worked. She raised two wonderful young
men.
And although her children were most important
to Olga, she didn't limit her kindness and
generosity to her immediate family. Her parents,
and John and Irma know how generous Olga
was to them during her short life. As a symbol
of her generosity, I would like to return
these gifts to her parents and siblings.
Olga's kindness and respect for other people
started early in life. When she was but a
teenager, she worked at a lithograph and
printing company in San Antonio. Olga saw
injustice in the workplace and she bravely
attempted to organize a union to better her
fellow employees' working conditions. Her
attempt failed, and she lost her job, but
her effort at helping others was unmistakably
Olga.
Olga also showed kindness and concern for
my family. She opened her heart to my brothers
as soon as she met them. She opened our home
to my youngest brother when he needed help.
She did so without question or hesitation,
because she believed in helping people in
need, because she wanted to help, and because
she loved my littlest brother. Olga wanted
to see him succeed in life just as she would
her own brother.
Olga was also a successful businesswoman.
She owned and operated a successful medical
billing business here in Austin. She employed
around five or six people, although, I believe
she considered them more as friends than
employees, and she treated them as she would
have wanted to be treated as an employee.
But, again her kindness was not even limited
to our families or her employees. Olga opened
our home to a friend of one of our children
during his high school days. And although
his stay with us was not very long, she enjoyed
every minute of it. Olga believed we should
treat everyone with respect and lend a hand
when needed. Our home was always open to
family and friends, especially our children's
friends. Olga loved kids and she made certain
that our refrigerator and cupboards were
well stocked with our children's friends
favorite snacks. She wanted all children
to feel welcome in our home.
Most of all, Olga loved her children. She
nurtured them and encouraged them to do what
they wanted to do in their young lives.
Sef, your mother loved you with all her heart.
Mama made sure you were able to participate
in sports and academic events. She loved
to watch you play Little League baseball.
She attended all your high school baseball
and football games. She cheered for Austin
High School teams louder and longer than
anyone else in the stands. And, she cheered
you on, the son she loved so dearly, at every
event. She watched you with wonder and love
as you grew into the fine man you are today.
Sef, Mama watched with great pride, and even
greater love, when you married your high
school sweetheart. Christi, Olga loved you
as she did her sons and as she would her
own daughter. You both should know she cried
when she was forced to miss Seri's birth
because the cancer she was fighting with
chemotherapy would not let her. Sef and Christi,
Olga saw much of our life in yours. She wanted
to help you and your new family as much as
she possibly could, so that you would not
have to struggle as much as we did. As a
symbol of her love and kindness, I would
like to return this gift to you, and to give
you this piece of her jewelry for Seri.
And Patrick - your mother loved you with
all her heart. She often told me she loved
to sit in the living room and listen as you
played your guitar down the hall in your
bedroom. Patrick, Mom loved to hear you sing
and play. When she heard that guitar music
begin or your voice begin to fill the house,
she would begin to smile, and her smile would
grow larger the longer you played. Mom would
turn to me with her beautiful smile across
her beautiful lips and nod her head yes,
knowing in her heart that you can do what
ever you want to do. Patrick, Mom truly wanted
you to pursue the artistic career you want.
She strongly believed you should follow your
heart, and she wanted to help you do it.
She made sure you will get a good start.
Put in the simplest of terms, Olga was a
good person. She lived her life by the simple
rule that everyone deserves kindness and
respect. My sons, my brothers, and my friends
worry that I will be lonely and lost now
that Olga has passed away. Yes, I will be
lonely, there is no doubt about that. Yes,
I will miss Olga tremendously, there is no
doubt about that. Yes, my heart will feel
empty. Our loss is immense. But, I also tell
them that I am a lucky man. Not all of us
will find true love and friendship as I found
with Olga. I am lucky because Olga entered
my life, loved me, and became my friend,
a true friend and life-long companion. That
one person with whom I knew I would happily
spend my entire life. I am grateful and happy
for the 26 years I knew, loved and lived
with my Olga by my side. I married my best
friend. You can't ask for anything more out
of life. I loved her deeply, more than any
words can even begin to describe. Olga was
my best friend. I will miss her. But, I will
also remember her, the good person she always
was.
By Walter
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